Cup of Coffee from Huck Finn's

Item Purchased: Cup of Coffee
Location Purchased: Huck Finn Restaurant / 3414 S. Archer Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.20 + tax

Review: Diner coffee is a thing of mystery and beauty. Mystery because you never know if it will be watery and weak or singed and strong. Beautiful because, along with the endless refills, the liquid is ever changing. An early refill throws off the balance of sugar and cream and you must treat the chemistry with a careful hand and keen eye. Will the hurried waitress tend to your empty reservoir, or is she too busy helping the other diners?

Regardless of the outcome of the coffee itself or the frequency of replenishment, the best thing about diner coffee is that it is always there.

Since Huck Finn's is open 24 hours a day, this is especially true of the coffee at Huck Finn's.

Oh, and in case you were wondering... It was weak today, but the waitress was on her game!

Rating: 3.5 / 5

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Chinese Rice Wine (Michiu 750 ml.)

Item Purchased: Chinese Rice Wine (Michiu 750 ml.)
Location Purchased: Chicago Food Market / 2245 S. Wentworth Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $3.75 + tax

Review: The label on this bottle of rice wine says "Not For Beverage Use."

I don't especially like it when my groceries tell me what I should or shouldn't do. I mean, that's the best part about moving out of the parents' place and buying your own groceries. Those bags of Fritos and Mello-Yello don't tell you what to do! Besides, with a warning like that on a liquid with 19.5% alcohol content, all I could think of on the way home was what a glass of this stuff would taste like. Of course, I know better and realize that it would taste worse than rubbing alcohol shots from a bottle cap, so I didn't. It seems like my groceries think I'm an idiot.

This wine does taste good (or it adds flavor rather) when used in a black bean vinegar sauce in sparing amounts. Though, not the fanciest or most fragrant wine to use in stir fries or other dishes, this inexpensive bottle of michiu will last me a long time and serve to spice up many dishes.

Rating: 3.5 / 5

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Scotch Sour from Lee Wing Wah Restaurant

Item Purchased: Scotch Sour
Location Purchased: Lee Wing Wah Restaurant / 2147 S. China Pl. / Chicago, IL
Price: $4.00 + tax

Review: When a menu has mixed drinks listed for $2.75, you don't ask questions. You also don't chance ordering something from the bar that is not on the menu. Anyone who has ever worked in the restaurant business will tell you that the price gouging happens there. What I didn't expect was my drink to cost me $1.25 more than the menu proclaimed.

Still... a four dollar scotch sour in Chicago is nothing to complain about... Especially when the glass comes filled to the brim and as strong as I would have made it at home (i.e. no sour, less liquid)

Though I find it a bit shifty that my check charged me more than the menu said, I am not going to begrudge Lee Wing Wah for a $1.25 difference.

Yes, I know it was crappy plastic bottle scotch they served me, but for a weekend afternoon drink during a late lunch of Pigeon, I'll chalk this one up to learning experience.

Rating: / 5

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Cup of Coffee from Bridgeport Bakery

Item Purchased: Cup of Coffee from Bridgeport Bakery
Location Purchased: Bridgeport Bakery / 2907 S. Archer Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.00 + tax

Review: Those of you who read the site regularly may want to get your tape recorders handy, because what I am about to say may shock you...

This may quite possibly be the worst cup of coffee I have ever had the displeasure to put into my mouth.

That's right... I said it. Bring on the Starbucks, Folgers or Starbucks/Folgers blend any day! This was quite offal (pun intended).

I appreciate a good cup of coffee, but I've also been known to enjoy a cup of watery swill more than the average bear.

Don't get me wrong, Bridgeport Bakery is good at doing what their name says they do... Bake! A coffeeshop, they are not. I've had lecture-hall vending machine coffee that tastes like it came from a silver pot when compared to this stuff.

BB's coffee is self-serve and sits in a diner-style glass pot atop a hotplate warmplate lukewarmplate room-temperature-plate by the entrance. After pouring it yourself and fixing it to your liking, if the smell doesn't hit you, the first sip will. Cold, bitter and watery with a bit of a dull cardboard aftertaste. Is this simply a leftover pot from last week's morning shift that got lost in the kitchen?

Oh the things I will do to wake up.

Never again. This was so bad, I had to buy a gutrot Coke to get the taste out of my mouth.

Stop in at Bridgeport Bakery for a pastry or bread loaf, but for your own good, stay away from that light brown liquid they call coffee.

Rating: .05 / 5

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Anchor Brewing Liberty Ale (12 oz. bottle)

Item Purchased: Anchor Brewing Liberty Ale (12 oz. bottle)
Location Purchased: Cost Plus World Market / 1725 Maple Ave. / Evanston, IL
Price: $1.79 + tax
Purchased on: 02/18/07

Review: After doing some preliminary research online (ha! "research" that's funny! cite my sources... "google"), I've come to develop the theory that most beer lovers have bad taste. I make this assessment based on the fact that most people who comment on Anchor Brewery's Liberty Ale seem to like the stuff.

Liberty Ale is much like the definition of the word "liberty" itself. There is a lot of argument over what liberty actually means just like there is a lot of internal argument over what kind of beer this brew is trying to be. As far as I can tell, it is a golden amber ale with pale tendencies and a pipe dream of becoming a full blown belgian fruit beer when it grows up.

To me, it tastes like the beer equivalent of mixing all of the sodas at a self-serve fountain together, then putting a bit of slushie in the mix to gross it up some more.

Such a dissapointment from a brewery that makes other fine beers (Anchor Steam). With that kind of attitude, Liberty Ale, you'll never grow up. Time to retire, if you ask me.



Rating: 1 / 5

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Small Coffee from Eat, Drink & Surf NetCafe

Item Purchased: Small Coffee
Location Purchased: Eat, Drink & Surf NetCafe / 246 East 14th St. / New York, NY
Price: $1.75 + tax
Purchased on: 02/01/07

Review: This quaint new coffee shop in Manhattan's East Village may still be finding its personality (it was formerly a copy shop and only became a cafe within the last month), but the coffee, price and personality of the owner makes up for it.

Though the coffee is a bit on the high end in price. It's also on the high end in flavor. Earthy complexity and low acidity makes this a great place to stop on your way to your day.

And with free wireless access, you can kill a few minutes rearranging your "Top 8" before heading into the office. You know, important stuff.

Rating: 4 / 5

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2 Small Coffees from Coffee Beanery

Item Purchased: 2 Small Coffees
Location Purchased: Coffee Beanery #254 / LaGuardia Airport / Flushing, NY
Price: $1.50 + tax ea.

Purchased On: 02/03/07

Review: You'd think, since I was on the east coast, that I would run to my beloved Dunkin' Donuts, which are everywhere. Nope. When in Rome, look for something Roman that you'd never find back home in Chicago. That's what I always say. (Okay, I've never said it, but, whatever)

Of course, Rome is part of the global economy, just like the rest of us, now. What I mean to say is that the coffee at Coffee Beanery is nothing I haven't had back home at a local Caribou coffee shop. Though I am not sure of the exact roast or blend I received, both cups were a lighter roast, and when mixed with the cream and sugar I add to every cup of coffee I drink, I'd place this coffee right along side the Caribou blend coffee I drink so very often.

Yes, I rate the Caribou blend rather high, but since this is simply a doppelganger of something I've had many times before, the Coffee Beanery gets a solid average score.

Rating: 2.5 / 5

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Brooklyn Lager (20 oz. draft)

Item Purchased: Brooklyn Lager (20 oz. draft)
Location Purchased: Jet Rock Bar and Grill / LaGuardia Airport / Flushing, NY
Price: $7.92 + tax
Purchased on: 01/31/07

Review: I knew what I was doing, but I had just stepped off an airplane with an empty stomach and a dry mouth. I had to be at work in an hour and had never been in Queens before, so I settled for overpriced airport food and libation. Not only did I figure I would be trying a local beer that I had never encountered before, but I also expected to be going the inexpensive route by picking something that was brewed only one burrough over. Obviously shipping from Brooklyn to Queens is an expensive freight, because this particular local beer cost me nearly EIGHT DOLLARS!

I guess everyone in the airport is a tourist.

Disregarding the obscene amount of money this fancy hole-in-the-wall last-resort sorry excuse for a sports bar took from me, Brooklyn Lager is a pretty decent beer! It is a fairly standard Amber Lager with bright caramel flavors highlighting its mildly hoppy bite. Brooklyn Lager finishes clean and leaves you wanting more, but at the price I paid, I chose to do without.

I wish this beer was available in Chicago. I'd add it to my rotating roster of standbys.

Rating (product): 4.5 / 5
Rating (price of product): 0.5 / 5

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12 oz. Starbucks Coffee from Potbelly Sandwich Works

Item Purchased: 12 oz. Starbucks Coffee from Potbelly Sandwich Works
Location Purchased: Potbelly Sandwich Works / Midway Airport / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.55 + tax

Review: I had a choice between McDonald's coffee or Starbucks coffee.

"Choice."

Yeah, right.

Potbelly's sandwich works is a great little sandwich shop with locations all over the Chicagoland area. Starbuck's is a decent coffee shop (in the physical sense) with horrible over roasted bitter product and locations all over the Milky Way... Including inside of other establishments' locations. They haven't quite secured their rooty tentacles in this Potbelly's location, but the seeds have been scattered by some sadistic rogue Johnny Coffeeseed. The outer shells of these seeds have started to crack and the Starbucks green is showing. This is apparant, in part, by the coffee sleeves that Potbelly's uses. Though a pale cardboard brown in color, these sleeves boldly proclaim that Potbelly's "proudly" brews Starbucks coffee. I'm proud to say that I am not proud to be drinking it. I am, however, not proud to say that I am a caffeine addict in the worst way.

From my blackened bitter tongue to you, I blow a sloppy overroasted kiss.

Rating: 1 / 5

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Small Roastmaster's Reserve (Changaimina) Coffe from Caribou Coffee

Item Purchased: Small Roastmaster's Reserve (Changaimina) Coffe from Caribou Coffee
Location Purchased: Caribou Coffee / 1328 S. Halsted / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.55 + tax

Review: Holy crap! A Caribou coffee blend I've never tried before?! Can it be true?

This particular roast is a light/medium roast that hails from Ecuador (which reminds me... Saskya, if you are reading this, send me your e-mail address!). The coffee has a flavor similar to Caribou's Colombian blend with a steady coffee flavor. What makes this blend so special is the peppery bite to it. On first taste, it may seem as if the coffee is a bit too acidic, but the bite of the coffee lasts throughout without lingering in your mouth like a swallowed penny (coughsbuxcough). The exotic spice is just what I am looking for in an average cup of daily coffee. Caribou's Changaimina delivers...but only for a few months, since this is their specialty winter blend.

I may just have to pay the stupidly expensive price for a pound of this stuff before it disappears.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

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6 pk. Oranjeboom Premium Lager (16 oz. cans)

Item Purchased: 6 pk. Oranjeboom Premium Lager (16 oz. cans)
Location Purchased: Trader Joe's / 1840 N. Clybourn Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $5.99 + tax

Review: Recommended to me by a friend as "watery swill" that tastes like the beer he used to like in London, I jumped at the chance to try Oranjeboom. "Watery swill" isn't the most glowing of reviews, but I like to keep my beer snobbery at a minimum and have to keep in touch with the real people. (Hell, I come from the land of Miller, after all)

Though Oranjeboom's name suggest something extraordinary, I'd like to propose the tagline, "every country needs a PBR!" Much like my proletariat potable of choice, this beer is a pale golden lager that tastes best when chugged directly from the can or bottle. Though most English speaking drunks... er... cold coffee connoisseurs may expect the "Oranje" in the name to suggest an orange flavor, it in fact does not. Oranjeboom is simply a satisfying Dutch pale lager with a bit more of a bite than PBR or Old Style and the cleanest finish of the three.

If it were a bit less expensive than $5.99, I might consider buying this beer as a staple in my refrigerator. As it stands, I may just have to save it for special occasions... Like Fridays.

Thanks to Mark Day for the recommendation... Check out his videoblog... The guy is way funnier than you are!

Rating: 4.25 / 5

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Whole Bean Costa Rica Coffee from Bridgeport Coffee House (1 lb. bag)

Item Purchased: Whole Bean Costa Rica Coffee from Bridgeport Coffee House (1 lb. bag)
Location Purchased: Bridgeport Coffee House / 3101 S. Morgan St. / Chicago, IL
Price: $10.00 + tax

Review: During the week, I make myself a cup of Greek coffee. A single serving (actually, a double) for the morning crunch before I have to be at work is good enough for me. For those lazy weekends, when I lay around the house trying to convince myself to wash the dishes and do laundry, I like to have a full pot brewing. By mid-day, I'm as wired as a Google server. Unable to hold a dish, let alone wash it, not much in the way of chores gets done, but damn if I don't get something creative out of the cobwebby nooks of my consciousness.

Bridgeport Coffee House is the perfect place to stock up on brain cleaning seeds. Their coffees are locally roasted, not too dark and more affordable than the more recognizable names in the legalized drug market.

The Costa Rica blend from BPCH is a medium roast that drinks like a light. Inner flavors of the coffee bean become full and bloom in your mouth. The slight earthiness reminds you that you are drinking coffee while the smooth and crisp finish prepare your palette for another cup. A perfect coffee with a midrange price for a perfect guy with a midrange... uh... nope... can't tie that one up poetically.

I guess I need another cup.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

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Tecate Beer (12 oz. can)

Item Purchased: Tecate Beer (12 oz. can)
Location Purchased: Handlebar Bar & Grill / 2311 W. North Ave. / Chicago, IL
Price: $2.50 + tax

Review: Tecate's slogan should be: "Because Corona is gross and Old Style isn't Mexican."

A cheap and pale lager, Tecate is fairly interchangeable with beers such as Old Style or PBR. It has a refreshingly crisp taste and comes in an unmistakeable red and gold can (unlike those other two brands that have the same color scheme). Tecate is also often served with a lime wedge (which most Mexicans don't used in their beer, I'm told) just like Corona. Drinking my beer over a mid-afternoon Sunday meal of blackened catfish, I realized something. I realized that I should add lime to more of the pale lagers I drink. Unlike the off-piss flavor that Corona develops with or without lime, Tecate actually tastes quite good as a citrus drink.

In addition to the great taste, it is worth noting that Tecate was the first beer to introduce the ecologically friendly non-removeable pull-tab on its cans back in 1985, thus reducing lager related pollution and making it much more difficult for the Ronald McDonald House to raise money.

Rating: 3.75 / 5

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Mythos Beer (12 oz. bottle)

Item Purchased: Mythos Beer (12 oz. bottle)
Location Purchased: Nine Muses Cafe & Bar / 315 S. Halsted St. / Chicago, IL
Price: $3.38 + tax

Review: Heineken Brewery was founded in 1864 while Mythos Brewery was founded in 1970. Sorry Mythos, but you're about one hundred years too late. Not to knock Heineken (I enjoy Heineken), but if you are going to produce a beer that will be heavily exported to other countries to represent your culture's brewing expertise, why would you simply mimic a normal, run of the mill straw colored pilsner? I can probably name a green bottled beer for each finger and none of them taste all that different. Mild, refreshing and a minor, yet varying, bitterness. Mythos is probably the mildest of all of the greenies I have tried, but by no means is anything special.

The more important question is why all beer that comes in a green bottle happens to be a mild, refreshing beer with mild, yet varying, bitterness? Is there some kind of alcoholic beverage global law that makes this a requirement? If anyone has an answer, please let me know, because I haven't been able to find anything.

The best part about drinking a green bottle beer in Chicago's Greektown on a Wednesday night is that Nine Muses had a half-off special on all drinks. The usual $4-6 dollars you pay for a Heineklone is pretty ridiculous, but at three bucks and change, you can't go wrong.

Rating: 3.5 / 5

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Gallo Dry Vermouth (750 ml.)

Item Purchased: Gallo Dry Vermouth (750 ml.)
Location Purchased: Dominick's / 3145 S. Ashland / Chicago, IL
Price: $4.49 + tax

Review: With all of the other wines on my counter, I hope someone doesn't drunkenly drink this bottle of Vermouth. I need it for cooking. (note: every other bottle of wine was emptied, but my guests steered clear of the vermouth... good thing I didn't have any vodka or gin!)

Whenever a recipe calls for white cooking wine, I tend to reach for vermouth. Because vermouth has such a strong aroma, you can sometimes get away with using less than a recipe calls for and still come up with a unique taste (thrifty, huh?). Vermouth used to be infused with wormwood (the herb used in making absinthe) but I am not so sure this is the case anymore. If it is, they use a very small amount, because the licorice flavor of wormwood is not present in this drink. Instead, the scent and flavor of dry vermouth tends to be that of cheap cough syrup. This is probably why dry vermouth is rarely drunk by itself and, instead, used in flavoring drinks and entrees. I find it works especially well with seafood.

Gallo is not one of the most popular brands of vermouth, but it is inexpensive and available at my local chain grocery store. Vinted in California, I have no complaints about this inexpensive bottle of booze. Martini & Rossi may be the choice of martini makers everywhere, but I don't need my liquor cabinet to look like a bar. I need it to look like a liquor shelf.

Rating: 3.75 / 5

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Coffee from Bridgeport Coffee House

Item Purchased: Coffee from Bridgeport Coffee House
Location Purchased: Bridgeport Coffee House / 3101 S. Morgan St. / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.29 + tax

Review: People who say Bridgeport is a desolate area of Chicago with no character have never been down to Bridgeport Coffee House. Spend just a few minutes at this tucked away neighborhood establishment, and you will not only see a destination for the locals, but a comfortable hangout that any visitor will want to come back to. Bridgeport is a more diverse neighborhood than its rap would suggest, and the crowds at Bridgeport Coffee House are a great representative of this. The owners and workers are always friendly, remembering and referring to their customers by name, sharing a story or two, or just asking how your day is going with a laid back genuine tone that is all but gone from coffee shops in the city. Did I mention that there is also free Wi-fi access for students and bloggers like myself?

If all of that isn't enough to get you down here, Bridgeport Coffee House is also a coffee roaster. Even though they have only been in business a little over two years, the owners invested their passion and money into their own commercial grade coffee roaster. Roasts are made fresh every day and are available by the cup or the bag. Coffees are less expensive and more delicious than most other roasters here in Chicago (or Seattle, for that matter) and usually a light-to-medium roast with none of that charred coffee flavor people have been duped into enjoying. The flavors are full and the aroma will make you feel as if you are inside of one of those commercials where it is the best part of waking up. Of course, coffee is always the best part of waking up for me.

Rating: 4.5 / 5

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Leffe Blonde Ale (16 oz. bottle)

Item Purchased: Leffe Blonde Ale (16 oz. bottle)
Location Purchased: Lula Cafe / 2537 N. Kedzie Blvd. / Chicago, IL
Price: $4.50 + tax

Review: While I don't usually review food and drink purchases I make for other people (even if I do happen to have a taste of the purchase), I felt that the sip I did have of this golden colored ale was enough to warrant an opinion. I feel this way because I doubt I will ever be taking a sip of this taste bud twirling atrocity again and would be remiss if I didn't take a shot at what is a poor excuse for a beer. Bear in mind, I love Schlitz, so base how seriously you take this review on that bit of knowledge.

At first, this beer tastes like a pleasant caramel ale on the tip of the tongue, but when the rest of your tongue is exposed to it, the true nature of this Belgian bamboozlement comes out. Though light in flavor throughout, there is an unmistakable cinnamon flavor to this brew. I half expected to see a cinnamon stick at the bottom of the bottle. My beer tastes run wide, but when it comes to woody spices like this, I'd rather have a hot apple cider than a cold brew.

Rating: 1 / 5

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Cup of Coffee from Eleven City Diner

Item Purchased: Cup of Coffee from Eleven City Diner
Location Purchased: Eleven City Diner / 1112 S. Wabash / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.70 2.25 $2.50 + tax

Review: Finally! A Chicago diner that uses Intelligentsia Coffee to keep the local businesses in... well... business and does everything right to meet my coffee standards. The Intelligentsia blend is not only a lighter roast, but Eleven City manages to keep their coffee hot instead of warm. Have you ever noticed how the waitresses at your local greasy spoon work up a sweat just by refilling your cup of coffee continuously? That's because their coffee burners are old and the circuits are fried and if the waitress didn't continuously freshen you up, your coffee would be as good as iced.

Not so at Eleven.

When I got my coffee this morning, I worked out my sugar/cream ratio, filliped the remaining sugar from the counter to the floor and took a sip. I then had enough time to finish reading the New York Times cover story about the transitional fish fossil found by scientists (as a result, I think everyone in the world stopped believing in god, by the way), flip to Gene Pitney's obituary, read half of that article, talk with the waitress who used to stop into my restaurant and finish reading the obit before taking another sip. Guess what? The coffee was hot! Not warm. Hot!

Light roast Intelligentsia at greater than room temperature? Jesus (who evolved from a fish, obviously)! Eleven City Diner needs to trip up soon or I'll still have to believe in creationism and contend that the limb-stump fish was all part of Xenu's plan. As far as breakfast joints go, so far this one is heaven-sent.

Rating: 4.25 / 5

Note (05/03/06): Price was raised to $2.25.

Small Discovery Blend Coffee from Caribou

Item Purchased: Small Discovery Blend Coffee from Caribou
Location Purchased: Caribou Coffee / 1328 S. Halsted / Chicago, IL
Price: $1.50 1.55 + tax

Review: This is the darkest of Caribou's light roast coffees and it boasts itself as being carefully roasted in order to subdue its acidic qualities. Usually I don't believe that mumbo jumbo on any package, but either this time it is the truth or acidity never entered the equation here. Regardless of what the honest to goodness is, this coffee is extremely satisfying, with no sharp bites or lingering bitterness. What you get, or discover (cue slapping of knee sound), is a simple and tasty coffee with a bit of a caramel tone to it.

Rating: 4.5 / 5