Update: From the Convenient Genitals department

Earlier today, I posted about a man who apparently cooked a severed penis in a convenience store microwave. Turns out that it wasn't a real penis, but a fake member... with real urine inside of it. The man was trying to fake a drug test by heating the fluid to normal body temperature. Another great line from the article:

Giant Eagle, the company that owns Get-Go, says the microwave involved in the incident was immediately removed from service and will be discarded.

It's not as if you'd be able to tell. Foods cooked in convenience store microwaves always taste like piss anyway. (KDKA via Obscure Store)